Internet Dating Not working for you, or are you too scared to try?

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Internet Dating Not working for you, or are you too scared to try?

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Recently, I have noticed that more and more people are bringing up the topic of internet dating. For years there has been a lot of stigma about people who meet on-line, from “there are only psychos online”, “online dating is only for people just interested in sex”, “are there any good men/women left???” or perhaps the old gem “online dating is for desperate people”.

Well let me tell you that yes, there are a few psychos’, people only interested in sex or desperados on these sites, but hang on, don’t you find these same people in nightclubs, bars and even in your workplace, or your family, maybe YOU are one of those people!! And at the same time there are genuine people, people like you (I Hope!) and me (Yes, I have used internet dating, with some tragic moments and very successfully too, so I am not just making this stuff up!). In fact in Australia, some 7 Million people subscribe to the top 5 online dating sites and there are around 500 sites to choose from and about 8000 worldwide.

Internet dating can be fun. How I hear you ask?? Well what if you knew how to write that perfect profile, you had a great picture that exudes confidence and fun; that you didn’t care about not making a connection because you know you only need one person and if you get a no then you don’t have to waste your time talking to someone who is not interested. What if you fully trusted this, that for every no you are a step closer to finding a yes?

So let me start by asking you a few questions, and I would like you to actually answer these questions as you go along.

  • Do you know exactly what you are looking for?
  • Have you thought about what it is that you have to offer in a relationship?
  • Are you really ready for a relationship or do you still need to get over the ex?
  • Are you confident in your choices?
  • Are you confident to go on a first date?
  • Does your profile (words and pictures) describe you to your best potential?

If you answered yes to all the questions then you are on the right path. If you answered no or I don’t know, then perhaps you need to get a little clearer about what it is you want expect from internet dating.

If you actually did know all the answers to the above questions how would you feel? More at ease within yourself perhaps?

 So How Do I make it Work for Me?

Be honest with yourself and with others. If you are looking for a real potential partner there is no point lying about who you are because that will just leave you feeling embarrassed and leave the other person feeling ripped off. No one likes to be lied to.

One of the best ways to attract the right person to you is to work on yourself and your fears around relationship. This can be fun and scary and very informative! “How do I do this?” I hear you ask. It takes a lot of honesty on your behalf. It takes looking at yourself and your judgements of who you are and of others. It takes you finding out what your limiting beliefs are around relationship (such as “I’m not good enough/pretty enough/smart enough/rich enough etc.). You see you attract whatever it is that you put out. So if you think that all men are liars then you will attract liars. If you believe that women are all shallow bitches then that is what you will attract. Changing your mindset, changes what you attract. And I can tell you from personal experience and working with others on this that when you change your mindset you change everything around you, including the type of potential person you attract to yourself.

If you would love to know more about this my partner and I, (incidentally we met online), are running some exclusive fun and interactive, 1 day workshops. That is small groups of no more than 30, where you will learn more about writing a good profile, protecting yourself from scammers, getting a good photo (and we will have a photographer there to take one) and changing your language to attract what you want, and not what you don’t want. You will walk away knowing a lot more about what it is you want and why you may not be attracting that into your life. or like us at

I would love to hear about your thoughts or experiences about online dating, so please leave your comments below.